Ask Gwendolyn…I made a mistake. I gave up my dream!

Dear Gwendolyn:

I am 26 years old and I have a problem. When I graduated from college, I had applied and got accepted to law school. During that summer I was told by my girlfriend she was pregnant. Listening to my grandmother I married her. Immediately after the marriage she started to show no interest in me. It was devastating. Instead of going to law school I took a job to support my family as a baby was on the way. The baby (a boy) was born at the beginning of her sixth month of pregnancy. He was premature—nine pounds. When I come home from work, there is no food cooked, the apartment unclean, and a crowd of at least 10 to 12 people sitting around.

Gwendolyn, I have high goals and she has none. She wants a divorce. What should I do?—Andrew


Dear Andrew:

Give her the divorce. I say this because your wife showed to you no interest. There is a strong possibility she never loved you. It would be nice if grandmothers and great-grandmothers would not interfere. You know…they are on the rules set in old school days—get pregnant, get married.

Let me tell you this: My advice to you is to allow your wife to move on with her life and you move on with yours. Within less than five years you could complete law school. Andrew, focus no more on your past but concentrate on your future. I wish you well—attorney. Think about it. You didn’t give up your dream. It was taken from you. I also feel you should have a DNA test on your son. It is suspicious—you may not be the father. Think about it, premature babies don’t come nine pounds.

(Realize the upside of being single. Read Gwen’s New Orange Shoes. To order go to website: or email her at: or write to her at: P.O. Box 10066, Raleigh, N.C. 27605-0066 (To receive a reply, send a self-addressed stamped envelope.)


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