What do you regret most in 2022?
That heartbreak? Remaining stuck in the past? Or fear of failure?
While these feelings and ruminations are all valid, it may be time to let bygones be bygones and break forth into a new calling or destiny — especially come 2023.
A new year brings not only optimism – especially for those tired of being in the throes of after-holiday blues – but a renewed sense of purpose and passion that can be a cure for regret and feelings of missing out.
As much as regret can feel like a lonesome experience, it is not uncommon. Research suggests that most people (72 percent) feel some of regret according to American business magazine, Inc.
What are people most regretting?
According to the magazine, they have regret with their ideal self and what that could be.
Statistics note that the single biggest life regret for 76 percent of participants in the magazine’s report is that have yet to to action not taken that would have helped them realize their ideal self.
“It makes sense that we regret not doing the things we think we are supposed to do: Working harder at our professions, working harder to be healthier…it’s natural to regret not working harder on things we ought to accomplish,” according to the article.
“When we evaluate our lives, we think about whether we’re heading toward our ideal selves, becoming the person we’d like to be. Those are the regrets that are going to stick with you, because they are what you look at through the windshield of life,: according to the article.
It’s time to take back those feelings of regret by making tangible progress in a few steps.
- Ensure one’s goal is tangible and specific in measurable ways.
- Make one’s goal important to the individual and not for others.
- Always make your goal a positive goal.
- Set the goal, and then forget about it.
“That’s why almost all incredibly successful people set a goal and then focus all their attention on the process necessary to achieve that goal. Sure, the goal is still out there,” according to the article. But what they care about most is what they need to do today–and when they accomplish that, they feel happy about today. They feel good about today.”
This time of the year, a lot of feelings of regret can resurface because of holiday regret, sorrows, loss and more.
In 2023, there is more of an opportunity to turn things around.
“Challenges make you discover things about yourself that you never really knew,” the late Cicely Tyson said.
“Never look back unless you are planning to go that way,” Essayist Henry David Thoreau said.
Renowned poet and performer Jessica Care Moore told the Michigan Chronicle that this time of the year is especially tough for her as she lost her father decades earlier but it still is a fresh reminder during this holiday season.
“This time of the year I understand it can be that way,” she said adding that her father passed in 1994 just two days after the New Years. “Right after every new year I am introspective and I can find myself in space not just sad but more … of feeling solace and wanting to meditate.”
Moore said that for those feeling a bit down whether it be through grief, regret or something else there is still time to move forward.
“Tap into that space …so that you can be still and to know that you got to push through and that everybody feels sad sometimes. And it’s OK to not be OK,” Moore said adding that there’s a solution to everything. “It’s the beautiful struggle to be in a space of happiness. I stay in that space of gratitude. Remembering what you have is a good thing to do.”
She adds that “wallowing” in what hasn’t happened yet should not be.
The quickest antidote to regret? Let your light shine, she says.
“Truly tap into what you need in your life,” she said adding that cutting toxic people out of your life is not a bad idea either. “I try to stay around people with a light around them and … stay away from light dimmers.”
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