If I’m ‘the demographic corporate America wants so desperately,’ why am I constantly sidelined?

Sarah Gethers sits for a portrait in her apartment on Wednesday, March 15, 2023, in Bellevue. If I’m ‘the demographic corporate America wants so desperately,’ why am I constantly sidelined? Gethers asks in her first-person essay. (Photo by Stephanie Strasburg/PublicSource)

Get the degree, dress for the interview, show up early, write legislation, run for office — none of that seems to be enough when you’re a pretty, dark-skinned Black woman.

by Sarah Gethers, PublicSource

There is something about being young and Black and educated that either draws folks in or makes them run in the opposite direction.

To understand that, there are certain concepts that must be explained:

“Internalized” means adopting learned behaviors and attitudes. Internalization can also be described as unconscious assimilation.
“Assimilation” is what minorities do to survive in a white male-dominated world. Assimilation is simply the act of becoming similar to something and, in the case of receiving young, Black, educated Americans, it often means being prejudiced, hypercritical and dismissive — as your white counterparts might.
Another concept that was birthed due to the white male-dominated world we live in is “colorism.” Colorism is technically defined as discrimination against those with a darker skin tone, usually within the same ethnic group. This of course was a survival tactic and now is an implicit bias too many of us have or have been the victim of.

So when someone named Sarah, who has lived in Italy, has run for city council in a capital city, who has a degree from a private Catholic institution walks into an interview and turns out to be a 5’8” dark-skinned, natural-haired Black woman in heels and a suit, people’s responses can range from intimidation or admiration to skepticism or even disgust.

I’m Sarah.

When I graduated from Duquesne University with a degree in corporate communication, I came home to central Pennsylvania without any prospects. My father — who was also looking for a job at the time and has a lengthy and impressive resume ever since he left the NFL and got his master’s degree in business administration — thought it ridiculous I couldn’t find work. He told me I am the demographic corporate America wants so desperately: How could we both be out of a job?

And yet, I walked into interviews time and time again for various levels of jobs with diverse groups of hiring managers only to hear new versions and layers of suspicion about my abilities to assimilate.

Too much and not enough

My attempts at employment in and around New York City were disheartening. From receptionist positions in Midtown and hostess gigs in Hell’s Kitchen to community engagement roles for minority-owned cafes, I couldn’t fit the mold of what was expected of me.

“Wow you’ve done so much. I am truly impressed with your background … but how do you think you’ll manage behind a receptionist desk? Not calling the shots?” I sat across from three white women in this lovely hedge fund office in Manhattan, annoyed because I realized after they finished “picking my brain” on my run for office, I had just scared them out of hiring me.

I eventually moved back to Pittsburgh, optimistic about finding full-time work in the city of my alma mater.