:10—Sooo…Here we go Pittsburgh Steeler fans, and for the first time ever in my proud, New Pittsburgh Courier history, it’s coming to you live from new turf, Applebee’s in Monroeville. And here’s where you can connect your BLACK and GOLD dots. Applebee’s is owned by former Steeler, four-time Super Bowl champion tight end Larry Brown. (And still, some of you people don’t think I know what I’m doing…Ha!)
:09—On to the game. Part of my new location to report from was thinking a new spot, new energy, all may result in a new FIRST QUARTER START? You guessed it. Not even close. As a matter of fact, this opening quarter against the Jacksonville Jags might be the worst first quarter start in football history!
:08—That being said, as we stumble into the second quarter with no offense what-so-ever, allow me to salvage this sports column with some old school good news. The Steelers inducted their 2023 Hall of Honor Class and this was a touchdown on all counts. Defensive End Aaron Smith…greatly underrated; Offensive Lineman Gerry “Moon” Mullins…the holder of four rings; Center Ray Mansfield…one of the last remaining legends; and of course, last and certainly not least, James Harrison, aka the meanest man in football during his time!
:07—This just in, it’s the middle of the second quarter and your Steelers have awakened. Two turnovers and a field goal to speak of. You take what you can when you can! Other than that, not much is new so far. Offense is still predictable, the “O” line CAN’T OPEN A BAG OF CHIPS let alone a hole in the line, Diontae Johnson still dropping balls while George Pickens is not being targeted. The highest paid defense in football CAN’T STOP AT A RED LIGHT, let alone stop a running back, and of course the continued senseless penalties. (I am sorry, have I been too hard?!)
:06—Halftime here at “The B” and the team has reverted back to pre-Rams status. Thus putting to rest the short, misguided rumor that the O.C. (Offensive Coordinator Matt Canada) has seen the light. No, Little Johnny, he/they are still in the dark!
:05—Stop…hold on…wait just a minute!!! This might be a good time for me to get on the fence and predict that the Steelers will win this game no matter how bad they play…that being said with 3:05 to play…we will win this game…or not!
:04—BTW, if you think that what the Steelers did to a Rams team that was minus three of their key players will carry over from week to week, you are sadly mistaken. The problems that they’ve had, they still have. Poor offensive play calling. No use of the tight end, the O-line is still a joke, and no desire to establish and maintain a running game.
:03—And for the love of you know who…Why are you not throwing the ball to Pickens, regardless of coverage? Well, as you know by now, even though Pickens did get a touchdown, the Steelers lost to the Jaguars, 20-10, on Oct. 29. Geez!
:02—Notre Dame 58 – Pitt 7…enough said!
:01—With the coming of Veterans Day on November 11, please be reminded of the 49th Annual Pittsburgh and Allegheny County Public Service Awards, recognizing and honoring those who protect and serve. Saturday, Nov. 4, at the American Legion in Plum. Special guests include former Steeler four-time Super Bowl champion Randy Grossman, Senator Jay Costa, Penn Hills Mayor Pauline Calabrese, Pittsburgh City Police Chief Larry Scirotto and soon-to-be City Councilman Khari Mosley. The event is co-sponsored by the Plum American Legion, UPMC, D.A. Stephen Zappala, Attorney Vince Lackner and the Soul Food Connection. For information call the Achieving Greatness office at 412-628-4856.
:00—DOUBLE OVERTIME: BREAKING NEWS – I JUST PAID RICK MURPHY THE $5 HE STOLE FROM ME WITH A LAST-MINUTE BET AGAINST THE STEELERS…WHEN, BY THE WAY, WE WERE ALREADY DOWN! IF YOU SEE HIM, DON’T HURT HIM, BUT KEEP YOUR EYES ON HIM. HE’S FROM BALTIMORE AND WEARS A RAVENS SHIRT UNDERNEATH THE STEELERS SHIRT!!!
GAME OVER.
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