by Alonzo Kittrels
Have you noticed that people do not dress up as they did in the past? Whether going out for dinner, a play, a dance, or even a funeral or church, people dress in casual attire. You may be familiar with the times when people wore their “Sunday go to meeting” clothing for special events. Brothers, in particular, were usually nastily dressed and often described as “clean as the board of health.” This saying has particular meaning for me as it takes me back to a childhood experience that shaped how I dress today.
This story, which I have told before, is worth repeating. I was approximately twelve years of age and was on my way to a birthday party with a cousin. At the time, I was wearing my one and only cream colored, gabardine suit. It seems like this occurred yesterday as I can still recall crossing the street at 43rd and Wallace Streets, when I passed a young lady crossing in the opposite direction. She looked at me, dressed in a suit with the pant legs and sleeves being several inches too short, and began laughing. I was so hurt that I started crying. I promised myself, after drying my tears, that once I became financially able, I would never have this experience again. My sister, who managed a drying cleaning establishment, then made certain that I had a presentable wardrobe and my father insisted that I always look the part. Today, I “dress to impress” as this was instilled in me, back in the day.
Many that grew up back in the day recall the emphasis parents placed on how we presented ourselves. Our parents strongly believed that people responded to you based on how you looked. Furthermore, our parents believed that how one looks often dictates how one will behave. Because of my strong belief in wearing a jacket and tie for special occasions, I have been described by a close friend as “fuddy-duddy.” While I do not know exactly what this means, I believe that he is suggesting that I am corny. However, I do not see anything corny in being “chocked up” as was the expression in the past.
A number of you from back in the day have probably returned to regular church attendance. I know that while many of you regularly attended church years ago due to the insistence of your parents, you slacked off a bit after your high school and college days. You have now returned as you are getting up in age, trying to restructure your resume of life, “just in case.” While you will observe that not much has changed in the way church services are conducted, you do see a change in how people are dressed; men in particular. In fact, many men are dressed casually, something you once observed in church goers of certain denominations. But dressing casual to attend a Baptist church was a “no-no.” Everyone, children included, dressed in their Sunday best when going to church back in the day. If you look at church programs from years ago, what do you see? Talk with your parents, siblings, relatives and friends about their memories of men and how they were dressed, back then. Without a doubt, what you will see and hear about men dressed in jackets and ties. It was not only what we wore, it was what was expected.
Some companies have dress policies of “casual attire” or “dress down day” on Fridays and during the summer months. Just last week I saw a man in Center City, I suspect in his sixties, apparently headed to work wearing jeans down below his posterior. This type of dress may not bother you, but I find this to be downright disgusting at any time, particularly in the work environment.
Recognizing that “what comes around goes around,” I keep asking myself when we will return to the days when there were no jeans and no sneakers in the work environment. Have you been to a funeral recently? Watching people coming and going does not make you feel that you are at a funeral. If you think the way men go out for dinner or the way employees dress for the workplace today is too casual, dress for a funeral is no different. You see everything. There are jeans, tee shirts, sneakers, even shorts. For those of you from my generation, you know that this was unheard of back in the day. Men dressed in jackets and ties for funerals, even if the attire was borrowed. It was considered disrespectful to the family and the deceased to be dressed in a highly inappropriate manner, back in the day,
Travelers today wear almost anything! Recall your recent travel experiences, whether by bus, train or plane. Travelers look like they rolled out of bed and threw on whatever was lying around the room. Some travelers look so dirty until you pray that they have not been assigned a seat next to you. Back in the day, however, men would not dare go to the bus depot, train station or airport without wearing a jacket and tie as this was the expected mode of dress. In the past, even though our travel plans may have included carrying a shoebox with a fried chicken sandwich, we wanted others to view us, at least by our presentation, as refined and dignified individuals. Therefore, while in the minds of others, our skin color may not have conveyed this message, our jackets and ties did, back in the day.
I suspect that there are a number of people who feel as I do with regard to people being dressed up. While this column focuses on men, obviously, the new way in which females dress as compared to the past deserves attention that I may pursue in the future. For those of you that share my beliefs, you are probably wishing that those days of being “dressed to kill” will return again, rather than being a memory that is only resurrected when we take a trip, back in the day.
(Alonzo Kittrels can be reached at backintheday@phillytrib.com or The Philadelphia Tribune, Back In The Day, 520 South 16th Street, Philadelphia, PA 19146)
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